N16 Magazine Summer 2003 - issue 18 page 5 Rowson's Comment

On Line You can e-mail us at info@n16mag.com In this issue Cover image The Fringe... ...the Festival Martin Rowson News in Brief Readers Letters Park Life News in Brief Dissent Tapas Time Back to the Fringe Straight to the Point Royal Bengal Handy Contacts Summertime Blues Summery Justice Up the Junction Books/Poetry The Factory Summer Allergies Farmers Market The Arts Away Days A Royal Visit Coffee Corner Surfing N16 Man in North Bank XWord View from the Lane Advertisers Page by Page 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5 6 - 7 - 8 - 9 - 10 11 - 12 - 13 - 14 -15 16 - 17 - 18 - 19 - 20 21 - 22 - 23 - 24 - 25 26 - 27 - 28 - 29 -30 31 - 32 - 33 - 34 - 35 36 - 37 - 38 - 39 - 40 OnLine Edition Designed by The N16 WebWorks	.	p5 Rowson's Comment		.
		Your Letters
		Dear N16 My name is Dynevor Roads and I’m a recovering drivaholic. Once I used any excuse to reach for those keys. Dog to the park? Take a drive. Nip up the shops? Take another drive. Kids to school? Give them a drive. Start ‘em young to develop the habit. I’d fly into a rage if I couldn’t keep my drug of choice (a VW Golf) within arm’s reach of the house. But the habit was spreading, as more and more drivaholics moved into Stokey I had to park further down the street, then in the next street. Then there was just nowhere to go. I’d just drive round and round, soaking up the juice until I found some dark and squalid little space to crash into. I became a one, then a two gallon a day man. Plus a bottle of windscreen wash. Once I got so low I hit a sleeping policemen. I went into ‘Councilling’ for four years, spending hours at a time in the Hackney Town Hall’s ‘sensory deprivation’ chamber. Now my habit is under control. I am on a 12 step programme. Those steps get me out of the door and on to the path to recovery. I never noticed it before; it’s just outside the house, between the front gate and my car! It takes me to the shops, the park, the pub, the bus, the train. And I don’t have to guzzle gas to use it! But it’s a path threatened by the unrestricted habits of unreformed drivaholics. They creep in from surrounding areas that have been cleaned up; where trained wardens enforce parking ‘rehab’, or CPZ as it is called. Ours is now a street of shame where every day you can see ‘speeding, ‘dumping’ and even ‘mainlining’ (down to Liverpool Street). We desperately need a CPZ treatment. For a contribution of only Ł1.50 a week we can help dozens of drivaholics to find a decent parking place near their home and loved ones and keep their habit under control. Some of the real derelicts and unlicensed users might even give up altogether. Then once more we can walk freely and safely along our street. Thank you for listening. (as testified to John Hudson)	Dear N16 Here are thirty-three things I hate about Stoke Newington. Three wheeled prams Ł2.50 a pint Streets full of shops and no jobs. Career beggars Primary school that you can’t get your kids in to High school that I wouldn’t send my kids to Stokie Police. Hackney’s biggest and best... gang No more Hackney homeless festival... why not? Shops full of expensive crap Bloody yuppies Estate agents Stokie Mafia (you know who you are) One big new swimming pool... instead of two big old swimming pools The wrong Mayor (again) Street loonies Muggers Kids who wear hoods in the summer A graveyard with more action than Parliament Hill Local businesses who make big bucks and still pay their staff minimum wage MPs who think getting McDonalds into Hackney is great for local employment. (Do you want lies with that?) Crackheads Junkies Prostitutes Shit on the streets A local council that’s so incompetent it’s not even funny Fresh and Wild Late night pubs that are so rough the bouncers have got bouncers The toerag(s) who nicked my last two bikes The loony who followed my girlfriend home singing ‘I’m gonna sex you up’ The Vortex for being too elitist for too long and then whining when they lose money The fact we can’t get cable because we live on an estate in N16 Competitions. People from Hackney never win competitions Myself. For still being here Stevie (full name and address supplied)
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