Our end of season slide was so steep and befuddling, they could have sold it to Alton Towers. These, from the papers...

'Nightmare scenario at White Flag Lane'. 'Tottenham were so lax, it was hard to take them seriously as a Premiership side'. '...displayed all the passion of a wet Tuesday in Rochdale'. '...thundering shot that could well have found the net, but for the ample backside of Gary Doherty'.

Brilliantly, David Pleat had played Ledley King in midfield and dropped our consistently
most committed player, Robbie Keane. When they handed out planets, Pleat got Pluto.

It was so pathetic it was almost funny. And of course, this being Spurs, there was a better punchline to come. Helder Postiga netted twice against England, having come on as a late sub for Portugal in Euro 2004 - knocking us out of the competition! That's twice as many Premiership goals as he scored all season. My apologies for turning the air blue at The Lion during that game, such that the table in front had a sweepstake on how long it would take me to swear at the screen again. How embarrassing.

But wait. Renewed optimism, anyone? Postiga is gone, back to Porto, where he can tumble with impunity. And Jacques Santini enlisted, having been 16,278th in the queue for the manager's job, and he's French. That he couldn't tempt Arsenal reject Wiltord to the Lane is equally worrying and heartening. We'll take Zidane and nothing less. (See, this optimism lark's working.) The backroom revolution also brought in Frank Arnesen and Martin Jol, about whom the buzz is addictive. Even Ronaldo joined in: 'Bigger clubs will be sorry they did not bring [Arnesen] over.' We look forward to Ron donning the lilywhite, latching on to one of Ginger Pele's floaters.

And Pleat, to his credit, blooded youngsters - Jackson, Kelly, Marney, Yeates - who played respectably during testing times. We also signed England under-16 captain Leigh Mills from Swindon, as well as 24-year-old countrymen Paul Robinson, national shot-stopper, and Sean Davis, who will bolster central midfield, develop and score goals. It bodes well. With the removal of Poyet, Anderton and Ziege, this is no aged squad. Not as old as Bolton's, anyway, since their purchase of Sir Les, who trebled the average age, bless.

It's a team for the future. (This August would be nice.) No sane Spurs fan expects an instant return to the glory days; right now, we'd take merely performing to potential. 
Once quality, guts, motivation, consistency and a midfield are in place, then we move upward.

Last season is best forgotten. Spurs begin again with a clean sheet. Let's hope we can bloody keep it for a change.